I have fear. I have anxiety. I am not as confident as some would think. Where do these feelings come from?
I've noticed this in my children also. As a toddler, they seem to be fearless – walking out in traffic, jumping in a swimming pool, touching a hot eye of a stove. They want to touch, feel, smell, and hear everything, and they do it without realizing the risks involved.
Then something changes. Almost overnight. All of a sudden, water in their eyes during bath time isn't fun anymore. The sound of a car's motor make them cringe with fright as it starts. They begin to pull back when they see something glowing red.
What happened? What changed?
It is experience in some ways. It is more of an awareness and understanding of danger. It is something we all gain through living life.
Some fears cause us to miss out on some really good things in life. Other fears protect us from something bad happening. How do we know the difference? How do we guard ourselves from being pinned down with unhealthy fear?
Here are some tips that I use when I am fearful somewhere in my life:
- See how it affects your life – What are you not doing that you really want to do? What are the excuses you are using to justify it controlling you?
- Discern it - You've got to know where the it is coming from to know whether it is a healthy or unhealthy type of fear. It can be considered healthy when respect is being shown for something – whether it is God, the eye of a stove, or hiding when a tornado is coming your way. These are definitely things to be scared of all the time in varying degrees depending on the situation. Unhealthy fear can be described as False Evidence Appearing Real. It is truly something that we can overcome if we try.
- Visualize a life without it – What if you did conquer a particular fear? How would it make you feel? Would you have more income? Would you be more fulfilled? What example would you be setting for your family and friends?
- Decide to face it – When you've discerned that what you are experiencing is unhealthy and you can visual a life without it, you must make a decision to face it or it will overpower your life. Most of us will have to take one step at a time to deal with it. But one step leads to another and so on until we have conquered it, or at least not allow it to control our lives anymore.
With life experiences, I've learned that fear comes in all shapes and sizes. It usually creeps into my life when I least expect it. We can't control what scares us or when it happens, but we can totally control our response to it.
You will begin to live a life without constraints with full confidence.
What would your life look like if you could do the things you only dream about? How would you feel if you could just do that one thing your heart desires? What is holding you back?
I'd love to hear what you could accomplish without fear in your life. Me, I started this blog. Share your fears, how you are facing them, or what you've gained by facing them in the past. Let's show each other that we are not alone in facing fear daily.